The Mean Mom

Just ask my 7 year old, he'll tell you. Don't believe him? Ask my 14 year old, if she still leaves you in doubt, my 17 year old can confirm it too.

January 30, 2007

Dirty... disgusting... filthy... lice-ridden boids... *

So, yesterday, I get this call at work. Kay is home from school and there's something making noise in the fireplace. She thinks there's a bird in there.

My solution? It found it's way down, it can turn around and head back up. (Note to self... stop at the store and get one of those thingies for the chimney.) In the meantime, don't tell Hubby... he won't know how to catch the bird, and I really don't want a mess or a bird in the house.

So, with all the stuff going on last night, I forgot about the bird, until Kay reminded me. I go over with a flashlight... I don't see anything. I don't hear anything. I open the doors, still nothing.

Let me add something here that is kind of important... I love animals. I don't want to hurt or see any get hurt. I also love me some good Hitchcock. I had nightmares about The Birds for weeks...

Ok, so since I'm not seeing any birds or hearing any birds, I close the doors, and go do my running and then hit the bed.

This morning, Kay comes to tell me that she "hears that fluttery noise" in the fireplace again. Yep, I hear it this time too, but can't see the bird. I get a towel, and try to find it to catch it and let it go outside. I open the doors, and there are 2 birds in there... Ugh... why do they always have to bring along a friend... or was this a date? You know the boy bird tells the girl about this nice warm place they go to be alone...

After much mayhem, the first bird finally gets the idea that it will NOT be staying in my house and flies out the front door.

Now, on to bird #2... this one is much smarter... well as smart as a Starling can be. It flies a couple circles around the living room, but the crazy lady waving the towel freaks it out, and it heads out the front door, too.

Let me remind you, dear readers, that I have several animals that belong in my house... 2 cats and a dog are the main ones... so while all this going on, and there is yelling and excitement from the people in the house, the dog is barking and yelping because she is in her crate and really, Really wants out so she can help, and one of the cats is looking at it like an opportunity to a gourmet meal.

Meanwhile, Kyle is in my bedroom sleeping through it all... I wish I could have.

*The Producers (1968 version)

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January 29, 2007


I really hate bugs. They are nasty disgusting things...

Oh wait, I don't mean the creepy, crawly kind, I mean the germy kind. (Though I'm not too fond of the crawly kind either...)

It seems there is a bug in my house. Last week, Kay had something. Not sure what, she didn't complain that anything hurt, just that she lost her voice. It went away after a couple days, and she's better... she's pretty wiped out though...

Now, Nikki has that bug. She however complains more. She says that her throat hurts, and she can't swallow. Lovely. Now, while I'm not a doctor, and I don't play one on TV, I have had my share of Strep Throat. I get it almost every winter, sometimes twice in one season... and one time bad enough I was in the ER hooked up to IV antibiotics for the day. Yeah, I know my strep. So, armed with my knowledge, I looked in her throat, and it doesn't look like Strep. It was kinda bumpy, but not the kind of bumpy that is strep. I really don't think that's what it is... but we have an appointment tomorrow to have it checked out.

Wonder if I can get a dose of meds for me... my glands are a little swollen, and I really don't want to spend a day in the ER again...

Maybe I'll just call my Dr, and see what she says... Of course then I'll probably have to get a dose of this... even more joy...

In the mean time, I think it's time to get the Lysol out and do a little exterminating... Oh joy.


January 23, 2007

But will he fly around the room uncontrollably?

Ok, I never claimed to be "normal" or to have "normal" kids... we are kinda crazy, and often goofy.

It's not uncommon in our house to end up in a fit of giggles at the dinner table. Or a belching contest. Yeah, we're mature too.

Anyway, here's our latest insanity installation...

Ky: Hey, mom, look at all the stickers I put on my chest. They're my tattoos.
Me: You know, that's gonna probably hurt when you pull them off...
Ky: Nuh-uh, watch (he grips the edge of one of the larger stickers and pulls... ) Look, it was on my pimple.
Me: Nipple. That's your nipple.
Ky: Oh.
Kay (sitting across the dining room table from Ky): Why's his belly button like that? It's an outie... kind of. It looks like it wants to be an innie but can't.
Ky (looks down at his belly button): What does your's look like?

This then turns into an examination/comparison of everyone's belly button. His is the only one like that...

Me: You know what belly buttons are for, right?
Ky: No. What?
Me: Well you know how when you blow up a balloon and tie a knot in it to keep the air in? Well your belly button is your knot to keep your innerds in.
Ky: (Look of disbelief...)
Kay (not one to miss an opportunity to jump in on anything... ) Yeah, see? We tuck our knots in so they don't come untied.
Ky: What will happen if it comes untied?
Me: All your guts will squirt out the hole. Please be careful. It's really hard to get them back in through that little hole.
Ky: (Staring intently at his belly button...) ALL my guts?
Kay: Yep. And trust me, it isn't pretty.

He then spent the next several minutes trying to "tuck in" his belly button.

Yeah, kids. A constant source of entertainment.

Think I should tell him we were only joking?

(See... told you I was a mean mom.)


January 22, 2007

Something to spice things up a bit...

You know how things can sometimes become mundane? That the things you used to look forward to are no longer as exciting?

I'm there.

I feel like I'm in a rut, and can't see the way out... at work, at home, at play (if you get my drift... ;) ).

I looked through the paper yesterday at all the pretty jobs... There were enough to choose from, but I found fault with all of them.

I do the same things all the time at home, and it's getting a little old... Monday run here, Tuesday run there, Saturday run here and there and then back here and there again!

My play... let's just say we've become "efficient" ... I'll just leave it at that...

But I will ask for some input on what you do when the worklife and the homelife become a bit "same old". How do you add the spice?

As for my playlife... you aren't allowed to comment on that one, thanks.

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January 17, 2007

Well, can you see the difference?

Did you notice?

No? Well I'm hoping that I can... I upgraded to the "new" blogger... Hope that now posting won't be such a pain in the... well, where ever it's a pain, cause lately? It's been sucky.

I would try to post, and it would take forever. I would make template edits (Like adding Beth's button over there... --->) and it took 20 minutes to republish it. UGH!

Now, hopefully it's all better. I wonder if this will improve my posting time on other's blogs? That comment thing was painful too.

Oh well, since you can't tell the difference, besides these nifty new tags I can give the posts, then I hope you stay and feel at home... and talk back to me! My kids do it all the time... ;)


January 16, 2007

So, I think I have the post holiday blues...

There's all this running around, decorating, shopping, wrapping, visiting.... and then now? Nothing. My living room looks 3 times as big as it did this time 2 weeks ago. There are no pretty lights in the windows... no gifts scattered underfoot... Oh, wait, that's a good thing.

It seems so sad to drive down the street and see all the trees abandoned by the curb. Some have the last remnants of tinsel still clinging to their branches. Just a few weeks ago they were all lit with lights, branches heavy with ornaments, the backdrop for numerous family photos... Now? Trash.

The cookies are eaten, the egg nog carton is empty, and the leftovers have been either eaten or thrown out.

There's no excitement in bringing in the mail, there aren't any cute cards, or pictures of friends and family to find and wonder over how much time has passed since you've last seen them. Now all we get in the mail are bills, and credit card offers. Who gets excited over those? Not me.

Oh, and the even most worstest part? I don't get another paid holiday until Memorial Day... in MAY! That's just so not fair.


January 14, 2007

We sure do clean up right good...

Last night was DH's company Winter Gala... Every year we talk about going, but then we never do... Last year, I bought the dress, we got the tickets, it snowed. This year, I wore the dress, it was 50 degrees and we had a good time.

I made Kay take a picture, cause we don't get dressed up much... LOL! I think we look pretty good... ;)


Oh.. and those are NOT Dh's ears! We have a large Crystal Trifle bowl that his sister gave me for Christmas one year, and it sits on our mantel, cause I have no place to put it... and he was perfectly centered in front of it... Looks like he has big ole pointy ears. ROFL!!!

And on an unrelated note... little bit of excitement before the evening really got going. Hubby was steaming his suit pants to get rid of some wrinkles.... It got pretty steamy in the bathroom... I opened the door to talk to him about something, let the steam out, and our fire alarm sensed the heat, and went off... Lovely. Yeah, you think, "No biggie, it will stop, no harm done." That would be the case if it weren't for the fact that our fire alarm is hooked up to the burglar alarm. Yep... the alarm company called, asked if everything was ok. I assured them it was, and asked them to PLEASE not send the fire dept. That would have been interesting... NOT!

Other than that little added excitement, it was a great evening... We were the best dressed people on the DC Metro last night... at least on the trains we were on.


January 11, 2007

Couple things...

1... I keep hearing about this DeLurking Week thing... and now it's almost over! Post! Tell me you're there... I'm here!

2... You know how sometimes you think that you want to help out a charity or an organization and don't think that the little bit you can do will make a difference? Well in the last couple days I've seen that proven wrong. The first one was over at Yarn Harlot, where she did a thing for Knitters without Borders. The turn out was INCREDIBLE! Over a quarter of a million dollars... wow... Then there was Beth. She wanted to do something for children, since she sees how incredibly lucky she is to have such an adorable healthy child. She too felt like I do sometimes, that her little bit won't make a difference. But when you add her little bit to my little bit to your little bit, it grows. I'm not saying you have to do anything, but hey, if it's making a card and mailing it to a child in the hospital, why not? How much time would that take, and think of the reaction that the card would get. It's all good.

Ok, so it's 3 things, guess that makes it a few... I didn't do a New Year's Resolution post, because, well... I don't make them. Why put that pressure on yourself? If you want to make a change in yourself. Start when ever you want. Take it all one day at a time. It will all get the same result, and you won't have all that Resolution crud hanging over you. Try it!

That's it for now, don't forget to come out of lurkdom, and comment. If you've got a blog, link to it, I love reading them... if you don't don't worry, I still love you all!

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January 09, 2007

Can I PLEASE pack away the summer clothes?

So... It's January 9th. Is it cold where you are? Saturday, just 4 days ago, it was 70. Yes, you read that right- Seventy!

I watch the snow falling on Colorado, and I feel a slight twinge of envy. Not much though. I mean I like the snow. It's pretty. For a day. Then it's grimy and gray, and nasty. I like winter. The air is cold and crisp and for a change from the summer when I can't see the Harbor from the bridge because of all the haze, on a crisp, cold winter day I can see the city clear enough to see the individual windows lit up on the buildings.

Today is a little more seasonal, and the weather man even used the "F" word. No, not that "F" word... He said "Flurries". I wouldn't mind some flurries. It would make it feel more like I think it should for the 9th of January. I don't want the 8 foot snow drifts that they have in Colorado, but I would like some snow.

Global warming? I don't know... there's been lots of talk about the ice caps melting and polar bears being endangered... I just hope that if we're going to all roast to death, that it takes a couple hundred years so that all the ancestors that I might think about, I won't really know. Does that even make sense?

Hopefully I won't have just jinxed myself and we now get dumped on. That would be just my luck...

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January 06, 2007

Wonder what this says about me...

Ok, for those of you that are lucky enough to know me in person know that I am not organized. Not even close. I'm so disorganized that I'm late for everything. Forget to do things... big things sometimes. I lose things... no, I still haven't located the bag o' goodies for my son's teacher gifts. Everyone knows that's just how I am.

For Christmas, Hubby and I got a new DVD shelf thing. The one we had, was overflowing, and we were using part of the bookshelf which meant that we had no where to put our books, so they were piling up in the bedroom. (Yeah, he's more organized than I am, but there are some things... ) Last weekend, Hubby and Kyle took all the movies out of the bookshelf and put them on the new shelf.

It was already almost full... Then, Kyle wanted to take a movie to daycare... he didn't know where to find it. It wasn't on the old shelf, so we had to look all over the new shelf... finally located it. That night it happened.

I got bit by the organization bug. I dragged over the old dvd shelf, and I put all the kids movies on that one, and the adult movies on the new one. The adult shelf was pretty full. While I was doing that, Hubby wanted to watch a movie, so he came over and was looking over my shoulder. He couldn't find what he wanted... Ouch! bit again.

Are you sitting down? I alphabetized the DVD shelf. Yes, you read that right. DVDs. In order. By title.

Oh, yes, sometimes I am a freak, and no, the bites didn't last long... that's the only thing that's organized.

I have to go now... I have to call myself. I don't know where I put my cell phone. sheesh!


January 04, 2007

Did you ever wonder about some of the things that people google?

I'm always humored by the ways that people find my blog... I mean there are the ones that link through from a comment that I've left, or from a group I belong to, but there are the ones that google a phrase and end up at my blog...

Here are a couple from the last few weeks...

1- "how to deal with a mean mom" - Ok, easy to see from the name of my blog that someone may think I know how to deal with a mean mom, but I don't. I *AM* the mean mom... Hope you find an answer to your question... and if all else fails, deal with her by killing her with kindness... do the dishes, do the laundry or clean your room.

2- "obnoxious children" - Ok, again, this one is pretty easy to see the link... I'm mean because my children, like all children, are sometimes obnoxious. When they become too obnoxious, threaten to make them clean something, this usually helps settle them right down.

3- "redneck barbecue cooperstown" - Really? I've been there, and there were no redneck barbecues... Maybe I was in the wrong part of town. That might have been more interesting than the Hall of Fame...

4- "terry cloth tube top" - Now this one scares me. Please tell me these are not coming back into fashion... They were scary when I was 18, I'm sure they would still be scary now. I guess because back then, I didn't have enough... top to keep the tube up.

5- "french horn circle of forths" - Could someone please explain this one to me? I have no idea...

The last one for today...

6- "moms castrating bulls" - This is one set of moms I don't know I want to meet... I mean, would you want to go hang out with these women? I bet they don't get hit on by the creepy drunk guys at the bar, though. At least not more than once.

The other thing that I've noticed, and I have conversations with others about this, are the ones that will do a google search for my exact url. If you know it to google it, why not just type it in and come here directly? Do you think there's more than one of me, and they're looking for the other one? Hmmm... that's a thought. A very frightening thought...

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January 02, 2007

I almost forgot...

I'm not the new kid on the block anymore. Meet my new neice, and her daughter, Lindsey and Rowan. And if you look carefully, there is baby bulge there on Lindsey. Woo hoo! Another new family member! Lindsey met Hubby's nephew while he was in basic training in the Army. He graduated, and they got married. They were talking of deployment, but since she's due in May, and that's when they were going to deploy Justin, they moved him to a different division so he can be home when the baby is born. Lindsey was in the reserves, but she just got out. They don't like it if you're pregnant.

Rowan was adorable. She just turned 3 on October 8, and is so cute! When you would get your camera out, she would say "Wait! I gotta pose!" and put her hands under her chin.


I have to admit...

I really never thought I would say this, but I feel a little sorry for my X-MIL.

I know! Shocking to you too, huh?

Let me back up...

When StupidX and I split up, she never had a nice thing to say. About me, about my decision, nothing. She slowly stopped being nasty, and was tolerable. I still heard stuff through the family grapevine that she was still less than affectionate in her feelings for me.

Then suddenly, there was a break through of sorts. I don't know why or how, but she was nice. I really think it was genuine niceness too... not that fake crap that you know is fake. She was as nice to me as she was when I let her be in the delivery room when the kids were born. Trust me... that's really nice.

So, in December, she took Kyle to a Christmas party. She always does, but this year, she had to call me to ask. I said yes, he could go, and he could either sleep over, or I would drop him off. She chose to have him dropped off since they had to go out the night before the party. She also asked if Nikki could come spend the night after the party with Kyle. I didn't have anything planned, so they could stay. She told me when I dropped them off that she really hoped they didn't say anything to the Evil Stepfamily. They were not invited. Hmm... interesting. I just let it go. Figured it was because there was so much going on that she didn't want to have to keep track of the whole pack of raving lunatics, plus my 2. Not so. She didn't invite them, I found out later, because she didn't want to share her time with them... just my 2. I thought that was very nice... she is big on family, and has ALWAYS made the lunatics feel like they always belonged to her familiy.

Jump to yesterday... my phone rings... as most phones do when you're getting a call... and it was XMIL. She asked if it would be ok if the kids came over to her house on the 14th. I quickly confirmed that they would be with me, and consulted Hubby, and then said sure, they could come over. I asked her what they were doing, just out of curiousity, and she said that it was the day they were going to have the family together for dinner for the holidays. She asked about Kay's work schedule, and I told her she usually gets off about 2 but no later than 3. I then said that since the dinner was in the afternoon, maybe StupidX could pick her up from work, and take her with him. She got quiet and said he wasn't coming. I had to ask... come on, you would too... She said that they weren't coming and she really thinks it's because of "Her". Yep. The Wifeypoop is interfering with her MIL's family time. She was audibly upset by this. I told her that I was sorry to hear that, but that I would be more than happy to have the kids there. I even said that she could call me and I would come back and pick them up. She then quickly hung up the phone. I know she isn't always the nicest person in the world, but they have been doing this dinner for as long as I have known them. They did them at StupidX's grandma's then when she passed away, they started doing them at XMIL's house. For longer than 22 years... and I don't think StupidX has ever missed one. Until now.

I feel sorry enough for her that I just might make some of my famous potato salad for the kids to take with them.

Poor woman... Family really is important to her. And, by having her grandchildren, and allowing them to spend time with her, I am slowly regaining some affections... But then again, that's not what matters, the fact they are her grandkids is what's important.