I have to admit...
I really never thought I would say this, but I feel a little sorry for my X-MIL.
I know! Shocking to you too, huh?
Let me back up...
When StupidX and I split up, she never had a nice thing to say. About me, about my decision, nothing. She slowly stopped being nasty, and was tolerable. I still heard stuff through the family grapevine that she was still less than affectionate in her feelings for me.
Then suddenly, there was a break through of sorts. I don't know why or how, but she was nice. I really think it was genuine niceness too... not that fake crap that you know is fake. She was as nice to me as she was when I let her be in the delivery room when the kids were born. Trust me... that's really nice.
So, in December, she took Kyle to a Christmas party. She always does, but this year, she had to call me to ask. I said yes, he could go, and he could either sleep over, or I would drop him off. She chose to have him dropped off since they had to go out the night before the party. She also asked if Nikki could come spend the night after the party with Kyle. I didn't have anything planned, so they could stay. She told me when I dropped them off that she really hoped they didn't say anything to the Evil Stepfamily. They were not invited. Hmm... interesting. I just let it go. Figured it was because there was so much going on that she didn't want to have to keep track of the whole pack of raving lunatics, plus my 2. Not so. She didn't invite them, I found out later, because she didn't want to share her time with them... just my 2. I thought that was very nice... she is big on family, and has ALWAYS made the lunatics feel like they always belonged to her familiy.
Jump to yesterday... my phone rings... as most phones do when you're getting a call... and it was XMIL. She asked if it would be ok if the kids came over to her house on the 14th. I quickly confirmed that they would be with me, and consulted Hubby, and then said sure, they could come over. I asked her what they were doing, just out of curiousity, and she said that it was the day they were going to have the family together for dinner for the holidays. She asked about Kay's work schedule, and I told her she usually gets off about 2 but no later than 3. I then said that since the dinner was in the afternoon, maybe StupidX could pick her up from work, and take her with him. She got quiet and said he wasn't coming. I had to ask... come on, you would too... She said that they weren't coming and she really thinks it's because of "Her". Yep. The Wifeypoop is interfering with her MIL's family time. She was audibly upset by this. I told her that I was sorry to hear that, but that I would be more than happy to have the kids there. I even said that she could call me and I would come back and pick them up. She then quickly hung up the phone. I know she isn't always the nicest person in the world, but they have been doing this dinner for as long as I have known them. They did them at StupidX's grandma's then when she passed away, they started doing them at XMIL's house. For longer than 22 years... and I don't think StupidX has ever missed one. Until now.
I feel sorry enough for her that I just might make some of my famous potato salad for the kids to take with them.
Poor woman... Family really is important to her. And, by having her grandchildren, and allowing them to spend time with her, I am slowly regaining some affections... But then again, that's not what matters, the fact they are her grandkids is what's important.
I know! Shocking to you too, huh?
Let me back up...
When StupidX and I split up, she never had a nice thing to say. About me, about my decision, nothing. She slowly stopped being nasty, and was tolerable. I still heard stuff through the family grapevine that she was still less than affectionate in her feelings for me.
Then suddenly, there was a break through of sorts. I don't know why or how, but she was nice. I really think it was genuine niceness too... not that fake crap that you know is fake. She was as nice to me as she was when I let her be in the delivery room when the kids were born. Trust me... that's really nice.
So, in December, she took Kyle to a Christmas party. She always does, but this year, she had to call me to ask. I said yes, he could go, and he could either sleep over, or I would drop him off. She chose to have him dropped off since they had to go out the night before the party. She also asked if Nikki could come spend the night after the party with Kyle. I didn't have anything planned, so they could stay. She told me when I dropped them off that she really hoped they didn't say anything to the Evil Stepfamily. They were not invited. Hmm... interesting. I just let it go. Figured it was because there was so much going on that she didn't want to have to keep track of the whole pack of raving lunatics, plus my 2. Not so. She didn't invite them, I found out later, because she didn't want to share her time with them... just my 2. I thought that was very nice... she is big on family, and has ALWAYS made the lunatics feel like they always belonged to her familiy.
Jump to yesterday... my phone rings... as most phones do when you're getting a call... and it was XMIL. She asked if it would be ok if the kids came over to her house on the 14th. I quickly confirmed that they would be with me, and consulted Hubby, and then said sure, they could come over. I asked her what they were doing, just out of curiousity, and she said that it was the day they were going to have the family together for dinner for the holidays. She asked about Kay's work schedule, and I told her she usually gets off about 2 but no later than 3. I then said that since the dinner was in the afternoon, maybe StupidX could pick her up from work, and take her with him. She got quiet and said he wasn't coming. I had to ask... come on, you would too... She said that they weren't coming and she really thinks it's because of "Her". Yep. The Wifeypoop is interfering with her MIL's family time. She was audibly upset by this. I told her that I was sorry to hear that, but that I would be more than happy to have the kids there. I even said that she could call me and I would come back and pick them up. She then quickly hung up the phone. I know she isn't always the nicest person in the world, but they have been doing this dinner for as long as I have known them. They did them at StupidX's grandma's then when she passed away, they started doing them at XMIL's house. For longer than 22 years... and I don't think StupidX has ever missed one. Until now.
I feel sorry enough for her that I just might make some of my famous potato salad for the kids to take with them.
Poor woman... Family really is important to her. And, by having her grandchildren, and allowing them to spend time with her, I am slowly regaining some affections... But then again, that's not what matters, the fact they are her grandkids is what's important.
2 babbled along:
At 2:01 PM, January 03, 2007, Queen Bee said…
Awww, Karen, I'm glad she's come around and I'm sorry that your x is being an idiot towards his own mom.
At 9:26 PM, January 03, 2007, Anonymous said…
I went through the same sort of thing with my XMIL. It was refreshing when I stopped being the bad guy and the finger was pointed in the correct direction. WTG on not holding a grudge. :)
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