There's the one with me and the little ones. It's the typical parent/child relationship. There's the one with me and Hubby. It's the typical married couple relationship (it definately has it's ups and downs, but for the most part, it's good). There's the sibling relationship. They love each other one minute, and then are plotting the other's death the next.
Then there's the one between Hubby and the little ones. Kay and Nikki were very conflicted at first. Here was this guy, he was fairly cool, and fun, and wasn't their dad. After some time, they became attached. They really do love him. And if you ask him, he's "Very fond" of them too... that translates from guy-speak to he loves them too. They felt bad for loving him. How would their dad feel about it? Did that mean they loved their dad any less? We've had many discussions about this... They didn't need to feel bad. They are 2 different people, and while they are sure they don't love thier dad any less, they know that they love Hubby as much.
Then, there's Kyle. He was the most at odds with this whole thing. He doesn't remember his dad and I together. We separated when he was 10 months old. He has known Hubby as long as he can remember. He's known his dad's wifeypoop as long as he can remember. He loves Hubby too.... and while I'm pretty sure he's fond of Wifeypoop, I'm not going admit that he might love her. LOL! He has no problem telling me that he loves me. He never has. He's very affectionate. He has even told Hubby that he loves him I think.
Here's the really funny thing though.... for the last 5 years, he has never hugged Hubby. Just recently, he has started giving Hubby a hug goodnight. I get the whole kit and kaboodle... I get the hug, the kiss and the "Can you just lay with me for 2 minutes?". It has only been in the last couple of weeks, that he will hug Hubby, and only then if I ask him to.
The girls don't either. Well Nikki does, but she's just that kind of person. She is the most outwardly affectionate. (She even gives me a kiss good-bye at school! Where her friends will see! SHOCKING!) I haven't quite figured out why they have no problem telling Hubby they love him, but won't hug him... I know it doesn't really matter. They don't have to give hugs or kisses to let him know they love him. They follow his rules, they respect him, and they ask his advice. That's all the proof he needs.
One day, I'm sure they will, but for now, I'm just happy they haven't mutinied yet.